The figure of Santa Claus is synonymous with modern Christmas, yet the jolly, red-coated man who says 'Ho Ho Ho' is an American invention less than 200 years old. Here at Wyrd Wessex, we look past the glossy modern image to trace where that familiar figure really came from, delving into ancient folklore, physics, and unsettling Arctic legends.
The British Lord of Misrule
The British Father Christmas has roots that go far deeper than his American counterpart. He was originally a much older, non-gift-giving figure entirely—a personification of the spirit of Christmas feasting and good cheer.
Historically, he was often depicted as a large, bearded man in a long green or scarlet robe, sometimes crowned with a holly wreath. He wasn't a visitor from the North Pole, but the Master of Ceremonies for the mid-winter festivities, encouraging everyone to eat, drink, and be merry. He was, essentially, the Lord of Misrule, presiding over the most chaotic and boundary-breaking time of the year.
Puritan Persecution
This older figure has no connection to the gift-giving traditions of Saint Nicholas. It is precisely because he was seen as a symbol of "drunken excess" and "popish" celebration that the Puritans banned Christmas celebrations entirely in the 17th century. Father Christmas survived, however, often depicted in popular folklore as a martyr of merriment and a symbol of traditional English resistance to austerity.
The blending of this native Master of Feasts with the imported gift-giving Saint Nicholas was a Victorian development, later cemented by American influences like the 1823 poem, 'A Visit from St. Nicholas', which gave him the sleigh and reindeer. The modern look was later solidified by advertising—but the original, green-robed figure remains the truly Wyrder version.
Beyond Physics: The Santa Identity Crisis
If we look past history, we find two compelling, modern theories that attempt to explain the impossible physics of a man delivering billions of gifts in a single night:
👻 Theory 1: The Global Tulpa
This theory posits that Santa is the ultimate, global Tulpa: an entity created purely by collective thought. For decades, hundreds of millions of people have focused their minds, their hopes, and their energy on one singular entity. All that global belief—manifested through songs, letters, and ritual offerings—is thought to have created a mass-produced thought-form.
In this scenario, the constant commercialisation, films, and advertising aren't destroying Santa; they are actively feeding the Tulpa energy. If the collective world stops believing, the entity ceases to exist.
🦌 Theory 2: The Arctic Cryptid
Alternatively, some argue Santa is more physical: a hyper-evolved, Class One, Arctic Hominid—the North Pole Man. This theory describes him as an exceptionally tall, unnaturally old figure with superhuman abilities who only appears one night a year, operating from an inaccessible, remote location.
As for the physics of the deliveries? The theory suggests the reindeer are somehow bending spatial geometry around the sleigh, a form of localised, Christmas-specific, dimensional warping, allowing a giant hominid to be a logistical genius while defying all known science.
Debunking the Red-and-White Myth and Sámi Horrors
Perhaps the most captivating theory about Santa's origin is that the red-and-white suit, the chimney descent, and the flying reindeer are all derived from Sámi shamans and the Fly Agaric mushroom (the psychedelic red-and-white spotted ones).
The theory suggests Sámi shamans (noaiddit) would collect the mushrooms and enter their snowed-in huts via the roof, delivering the dried fungi. The flying reindeer were a simple hallucination from ingesting the drug.
The Terrifying Truth
According to Nordic Studies experts and the Sámi themselves, this story is a captivating lie. The true Sámi midwinter traditions—called Juovllat—were focused on survival against terrifying entities:
The Stállu (soul-sucker): A cannibalistic giant dressed in dark clothes who would slaughter children at Christmastime and used an iron pipe to suck the life spirit out of victims. Protection was sought only by leaving out a bucket of water.
The Gufihtar (Hidden People): Invisible spirits of the land who, if disrespected, will torment you or even cast a spell to set your house on fire.
Furthermore, there is scant evidence that Sámi shamans relied on the Fly Agaric mushroom, as they were often gone by midwinter. The consensus holds that the mushroom theory was invented by outsiders, likely through a misreading of indigenous culture and the use of Sámi-inspired elements in 19th-century illustrations.
Ultimately, the Santa Claus we love is a complex, multilayered figure: Saint Nicholas meets Dutch folklore, blended with the British Lord of Misrule, and packaged by American advertising. The Wyrder theories, however, prove that even in modern times, the question of who—or what—is lurking out in the midwinter darkness remains open.