Welcome, fellow seekers of the strange and unusual! If you've been tuning into AfterWyrd, you know that our bonus episodes are where hosts Andy and Craig truly let loose, digging into the bizarre corners of the internet to bring you the most captivating "Wyrd News." This week's installment was no exception, delivering a delightful, and at times unsettling, mix of human oddities, animal antics, and genuinely creepy phenomena. Let's recap the headlines that had us scratching our heads and checking our reflections...
The Thirsty Priest: When Holiness Meets the Hottest Take
First up, a story that perfectly encapsulates the internet's unique blend of reverence and rampant desire. A church, in an attempt to connect with its congregation (we assume), introduced a "hot priest" via a video. The result? A digital stampede of comments so "thirsty" they literally had to be turned off! From "Father, lead me not into temptation unless you're free Friday" to the succinct "I'm Muslim, but Jesus Christ," the online faithful (and not-so-faithful) made their feelings known. It's a testament to the undeniable power of charisma – and perhaps a little too much time scrolling – proving that even sacred spaces aren't immune to the viral allure of a handsome face. It seems the "great schism" of 2025 might just be over who gets to sit in the front pew.
The Modern Vampire: Blood Sausage and Consent-Based Energy Sucking
Forget dusty castles and ancient curses; meet the 21st-century vampire. Helen Schweizer, or "Vampire Helly," isn't your typical neck-biter. This "vampfluencer" from Ohio has garnered over 47,000 TikTok followers by revealing her unique take on the undead lifestyle. While she sports fangs and gothic attire, Helly's real "feeding" comes from energy – ambient energy, to be precise. She emphasizes that deep energy feedings always require consent, making her an ethical (and rather polite) vampire. And for those physical cravings? Forget human blood; Helly prefers a good old-fashioned bloody sausage. Who knew the secret to eternal youth (or at least, sustained TikTok fame) lay in mindful meditation and a trip to the butcher?
Reggie the Randy Dolphin: When "Flipper" Gets a Little Too Friendly
We all love dolphins, right? Playful, intelligent, graceful... but sometimes, they're just a little too friendly. Enter Reggie, the bottlenose dolphin of Lyme Bay, Dorset, who's been making headlines for "basically drowning" two women. Kaiokas reported having to rescue swimmers when Reggie began jumping on and pushing them underwater. While authorities urge caution, suspecting Reggie might be injured or simply too familiar with humans, Andy and Craig delved into the more... biological possibilities. Dolphins, it turns out, can be quite "randy," and their interactions aren't always as innocent as they seem. This story serves as a stark reminder: when you're in their territory, even a beloved marine mammal can quickly become a surprisingly strong (and perhaps inappropriately affectionate) force of nature.
The Cursed Parcel: The Return of the Embroidered Horse
Finally, a tale that truly sends shivers down the spine. A woman on TikTok shared her unsettling experience with a "creepy picture of an embroidered horse." After her daughter sold it on Vinted, received good feedback, and confirmed delivery, the parcel mysteriously returned to their home. Not only that, but it was delivered to her ex-mother-in-law's house before making its way back to her. Untampered, perfectly packaged, and with the buyer's acceptance confirmed – it was the same picture. Was it a simple postal error? Or, as some TikTok users suggested, a haunted picture with a spirit that simply refused to leave? The story echoed other tales of unwanted objects returning, like a mysteriously reappearing wooden clog. Sometimes, it seems, you just can't get rid of what's meant to stay.
What do you make of these wyrd headlines? Have you encountered any thirsty priests, consensual energy vampires, or aggressively amorous marine life? And have you ever had an object refuse to leave your home? Let us know in the comments below.